My favourite is:
'the batsman's Holding--the Bowler's Willie'
There have been some howlers in this test.
Hoggard apparently, can 'make his balls swing either way'
While Flintoff (sigh) 'hasn't had a look at it for a while'
They have all encountered 'a little tickle on the side'
Most of them could 'bowl this maiden over' any time.
Good luck the lads
L

Any poor patron desirous of my attentions tomorrow will be disappointed---unless they are into hearing the thwack of leather on willow.

England V Australia----Jones has been declared unfit---he seems pretty
fit to me pal.

Mr Flintoff with his gorgeous butt and rosebud lips will have to suffice.

My crease is fit for Lords
L

Within the space of 9 months i have evolved from another mere lady working in the sex industry to----well, i wouldn't be surprised if that Tarantino came tap, tap, tapping on my window pane.
Little ol' ladies cross the street to shake my hand (to say good things) and my emails are rammed to the gills with requests from production companies or posh newspapers.
Funny old world.

Within the last few weeks i have been approached not only to do 'stand up comedy/afterdinner speaking' but also to appear on a mainstream chatshow.
I assume this attention is due to the publication of my book: BODY WORSHIP-True stories of a sex goddess.
This is all very well, but whilst i am adept at disrobing for a stranger...i quake at the prospect of standing up for an expectant audience or sitting down to be grilled on the intricacies of the 'sex industry'
I hope i aquit myself well..but this is like learning a new trade.
I remember my first patron....and i was petrified.
Now i have to terrify myself with something else.
I guess that's life.
L