I may be paranoid, but...

I had a thought today while preparing to head to a date earlier tonight. It didn't occur to me to post it before, as this has become second nature to me. Call me crazy for having this weird little rule, but I am a natural worrier and would prefer being paranoid to being dead.

I never, ever wear or bring anything with me to a date that could be used as a ligature or strangulation device. This includes belts, scarves, necklaces (unless they are made of 24k gold and would easily break if someone tried using them as a ligature), purses with long straps, lingerie or bikinis with long strings and even pantyhose and thigh-highs.

Again, call me crazy, but the most serious creeps have the ability to seem normal and often one can't tell who these people are until it's too late. I vividly remember following newspaper articles about the then-ongoing investigation into a local serial-killing spree targeting SWs, and I believe an escort as well (google Robert Yates & Spokane, WA) while in middle school, and grew up hearing about my mom's high school friend whose life was cut tragically short by the infamous Ted Bundy. I could go on, I can think of at least 2 other awful creeps from the Pacific NW who made national headlines, but I'm sure you catch my drift.

Providers in Washington state (and perhaps beyond): if you find yourself the victim of a sting and you are carrying mace, you will have a mountain of legal problems stemming from possession of a deadly weapon during the commission of a crime. I've had others in the business tell me that pepper spray is acceptable and not considered lethal.

Hope these protective measures remain a precaution only and that you never find yourself in such a situation in which you actually need them. Stay safe ladies and gents!

hey sista trust me i really feel what you are saying and appreciating you sharing your experiences in an effort to warn us. yeah no doubt most fools wont bother to heed your wise words, as per usual, but you know on a site like this us real people be the moral majority...

not got so much time atm jus chillin with mi daughter and lil granddaughter so i keep it short and sweet. these rapists can hardly remember to show love so they rape us and try to torture kidnap and even kill people tho thankfully thats a lot more rare. i think one of their purposes behind this, whether they realise it or not is to make us as unfeeling and corrupted as tjeu are/

evem tjese oppressor leaders with all their money and power look so miserable and scared a lot...cant be much fun having a limp std infested dick i wud have thought and fucking dead women but we all make our own choices that why the lord give us free will...

Jah Bless X

Hi Serena you and I are the same... Thank you for sharing now I don' feel weird knowing I have someone who thinks like me in this matter.

I do not kow if you know the following tips already. If you do then skip it if not may be read them and think about.

SAFETY TIPS FOR ESCORTS

First Things First (Be Anonymous)
Get a PO Box and have it placed on your Drivers license or State ID instead of your home address. You don't need nosey clients knowing your home address.
Use a prepaid cell phone so there are no billing records where callers can use identity theft technology to uncover your real name and residence.

Money Issues (Use Anonymous Payment Methods)
Use prepaid credit cards and gift cards to pay for advertising and other services.
Use PayPal to receive payments, and to make payments.
Do not link your paypal account to any checking accounts or credit cards with your real name and billing address. You can also preload your Paypal account with a prepaid creditcard.
Set up PayPal mobile so you can have customers text message you money, if they run out of cash.
Do not take credit cards as they can be disputed.
Do not take gift cards from new or unknown customers, because they can be empty when you get them.
Do not take checks or Money Orders as they can have stop payments put on them, or they can be forged.
Be wary of cash payments, know what real money looks like as bad clients sometimes use conterfeit money.

When On The Phone, or Emailing, with A New Customer
Clearly explain the service to the client; what it will involve (companionship), how long it will last and how much it will cost (the donation) for your time.
Do not discuss donation rates or talk sex with a customer.
Be wary of clients who say they don't have a home phone, or who only have a mobile phone to book the service. To pass screening they must provide information that can be verified by other providers or other search or credit report searches.

Booking An Incall
Never do incall appointments with a first time caller, and compromise your home safety.
If you do incall, keep your vehicle, and house or apartment doors locked at all times.
For Incall, emphasize that you do not accept, nor appreciate drop-ins and to respect your schedule and privacy.
Don't have money, or valuables in the room you entertain clients in.
Don't have ID or personal items in the room with you where a stranger can look through to determine your real name or personal information.
If you do incall from an apartment or condo, or hotel, don't tell your customer your unit or room number until after he arrives and calls you to tell you he has arrived. This way you can look out to see if anyone else, or other vehicles, arrived with your appointment to determine if he's safe to give your unit or room number too.

Booking An Outcall To A CLient's Home or Hotel Room
Verify the home address or hotel is an actual address, so that you don't arrive to find out you've been the victim of a practical joke or prank.
Do NOT rely on your dates for transportation to and from your appointments. You don't want a complete stranger picking you up at your home, nor do you want to depend on him bringing you him if these don't work out.
For Outcall appointments, use a driver or let someone know the address of where you're going.
If the customer is at a hotel and you are to meet them at their room, get their real name and room number, then later call the hotel desk to verify. If the hotel doesn't have his name registered, he's not checked in yet, or he gave you a fake name. Either way, RED FLAG!
Outcall appointments are usually safer in an upscale hotel and not someone's home or flea bag motel.
Don't book calls with any clients who insist that you do NOT use a driver or taxi.

Arriving To An Outcall
Always be extremely aware and in tune with your surroundings.
If you are going to a client’s private home or hotel, drive by the house first to check for signs that might suggest “something is not right”. For example, if there are several cars in the driveway indicating others are there, or you hear loud music coming from the house indicating a party is going on, or the music is an excuse for the client not to hear you so they don’t answer the door. Or you see more than one person in or around the house, or men sitting in cars parked near the house . If you feel something is wrong call the client on your mobile to discuss your concerns, if you don’t get answers that satisfy you, cancel the booking. Don’t do it while you are safe in your car, not at the door or inside their place.
Carry in your purse only what you need, and no personal id or real information about yourself. No check books, credit cards, bank deposit slips. Many bad clients are stalker types who seek to obtain your real name, your residential address, and address, and your private or residential phone #.
Don’t take cash or ID with you to the job.
Let the client know, or give him the impression that there is someone (driver) waiting outside for you, even if you are not using a driver.
At the start of the booking call someone (a friend, maybe a relative or even your own answering machine). This will let the client know that someone else knows where you are and that your whereabouts can be traced.

Avoiding a Hotel or Motel. Vice Sting
If it’s a new client. Get there at least a half hour early. Check the parking lot carefully when you arrive. Most of the time cops have someone in a car watching and warning the guys in the room that someone is on the way in.
When you walk into the room look for door attaching to the next room next door. If you see one, be safe and say you don’t feel well and have to go, then leave, because 9 times out of 10 it is a set-up.
Look for rooms that are too neat, where there is no luggage, no clothes in the closet, the bathroom is perfect, towels and soap hasn’t been used.
Cops may try and stage the room to make it look like a mess. Leaving a beer can or cigarettes around in an ashtray. Ask the client when they checked in. See if the room is reasonably messy considering the time they’ve supposedly been there.
When they talk about sex or keep trying to get you to talk about money and sex. And if the client’s voice is unusually louder, maybe for a bug or recording device.

Before Starting The Session
Your Donation should be available and in full view. If it is not, politely ask for donation saying you find that aspect of business more pleasant if you can get it out of the way beforehand. Actually this is for you to protect you from getting ripped off with the client saying he forgot his wallet or needs to go to an ATM.


During The Appointment
Be confident and assertive from the moment you arrive. It's important to be in control and stay in control of the situation.
Be polite and friendly, it's often the best way to keep control even when the client is behaving like a jerk.
Don't leave anything laying around the customer can go through.
Be aware of every thing the customer is doing.
If you must use the bath room take your purse with you.
If a customer is at your incall, do not let him wander through out your place. Restrict him to your work space only.


When Things Go Bad
If you sense trouble coming, try to avoid it. Change the conversation, always be pleasant.
If the client starts talking down to you, or calling you bad names, turn things around, be assertive and take back control. Bad clients may test you to see what they can get away with and push you to those limits.
Or if you can't alter the direction things are going. Take notice, find a polite reason to leave.
If you want to leave and the client forces you to stay or won't let you leave, you can scream for help.
Or, you can throw something through a window, the noise will attract attention.
Never affront or defame a customer, and never at all in public. You have to go on working and want to be safe.

When Good Clients Go Bad
Many Clients forget you are providing a service and get attached.
Always be aware of what you're doing and saying so you don't lead them on.
Always be cordial, pleasant, and professional.
Don't get involved in a client's personal life or problems.
A client's personal problems are not your problems.
Just because a client spends money on you, doesn't mean you owe them anything more outside your service.
Stay emotionally healthy by being emotionally detached.
Don't get involved with your clients and date them
Once you start dating a client, he will want to control you and stop you from working.
He will get depressed, angry, or resort to guilt and manipulation to control you. What does your client know about your business? What qualifies him to consult you how to act?
Do not marry your client. One day the fantasy will end, and he will discover that, "Having is not the same as Wanting!"
Many clients have issues with women, and therefore do not, or can not, have normal healthy relationships with women. That is why they pay for your time and services. Keep this in mind and remember to not ever get involved, date, or marry your customers.

Avoiding Health Issues
If you do Full Service, GFE Girlfriend Experience, or PFE Porn Star Experience, wear a condom. Always use condoms for oral, vaginal, and anal sex, and when using sex toys.
Always inspect the client's body the best you can.
If you see sores, use protection, or better yet, avoid contact or cancel appointment.
Have yourself tested frequently.
Check your client for STDs, especially for crabs, sores, herpes blisters and warts. Condoms do not protect you 100% against these.
Do not use massage oils as lube. They break down the condom rubber. Use water-based lube such as wet stuff or KY jelly and wipe off any massage oil before you put the condom on.
Use your own condoms, not your client's.
Be aware that Nonoxynol 9 condoms cause medical problems for some workers (Nonoxynol 9 can remove nail polish so it is best not to use it on regular basis).
Putting on a condom with your mouth is useful if the client does not want to use them, this can eroticise condoms.
If you use xylocaine, be aware of the risks. It is not advisable to use xylocaine for penetrative sex. Due to the numbing effect, you are less likely to feel any injury or become aware that a condom has broken. Xylocaine can numb the client’s penis, and make it difficult for him to cum.
If the client does not take no for an answer about using condoms, suggest another activity such as Spanish sex (between the breasts) or hand relief with lube.
If the client refuses to use some or any safety measure for safe activities, leave!
You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.
When it comes to detecting an STD, TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS!! Be safe, not sorry!
If you sense or see something's really wrong, smell a bad discharge, just get out! Leave politely, say something like, I've forgotten my special bag and have to get it from the car. Or I have to let my driver know you're OK and I'll be staying, and then leave.

Avoiding Law Enforcement Stings and Legal Problems
Is the caller a known and respected hobbyist?
Have caller provide you references from a known and trusted provider.
Do not talk about sex on the phone, in email, or answer questions regarding sex or until you know for sure he is completely safe with him to do so.
Use National Blacklist to check on the phone # and email they contacted you with.
Do not unnecessarily activate LE or get LE activated by other groups (for. ex. having a website with pornographic content).


Avoid Passive Ripoffs
Do not take credit cards as they can be charged back.
Do not take checks, personal checks, cashiers check , or otherwise. They can be fake, forged, or have stop payments put on them.
Do not take gift cards as they can already be used up with no balances on them.
When the client pays or gives you the donation envelope, excuse yourself and say you have to go to the ladies room. Once alone, count the money to ensure it is there in full.
Put the money away in a safe place, away from wandering hands when you may not be looking. To be safe...
Remember. Bad clients will try to take back money when you are in the bathroom, shower, asleep, or distracted on a phone call. Make it difficult for them to find your money.

Avoid Active Ripoffs
If you are feeling stressed or are in a bad mood, your work will suffer. Take some time off to relax and recharge. A good escort does not work when she knows that then encounter will be a disappointment for her customer.

Other Red Flags
Be wary of clients who insist that you do not use a driver or take a taxi to his location.
Look through the whole house or hotel room to check for signs of other people, for signs of danger, vice stings, drugs, or paraphernalia. You could say, “this is a lovely house, would you mind giving me a tour?” Or you could ask to go to the toilet and then have a quick look around. Be alert at all times.

Other Tips
Don’t drive to a far away call on an empty tank of gas and then depend on the call going though to give you gas money so you can fill up on the drive home. Many providers have stranded themselves that way.
Carry a mobile phone with you at all times.
If your date is picking you up, have him meet you at a public place or meet you on the corner of the address you live. Until he’s proven himself safe. Don’t give him your actual address.
Carry enough cash for a taxi, if you are going on a date and he picks you up, and things go bad, you aren’t stranded.

Stimulants - Alcohol - Drugs
Don’t accept a drink that has already been opened or that you have not seen being made. It’s not difficult for him to slip a drug (like rhohypnol) into the drink he’s fixed for you.
Do not drink beverages that you did not open yourself.
Remember that alcohol begins to impair your judgment with the first drink.
Do not share or exchange beverages with anyone you don't know and trust.
If someone offers you a beverage from a bar at a club or a party, accompany the person to order your beverage, watch it being poured and carry the beverage yourself.
Do not leave your beverage unattended while talking, dancing, using the restroom, or making a phone call.If you realize that your beverage has been left unattended, discard it.
Do not drink anything that has an unusual taste or appearance, (salty taste, excessive foam, unexplained residue, etc.)Monitor your drinking.
A drink to relax is one thing, but too many drinks may place yourself in danger.
Never be afraid to say no thank you, or no thanks, I’ve had enough.
Make sure you are not under the influence of alcohol of drugs when visiting clients. Too much alcohol will affect your judgment and ability to defend yourself.

Poor Hygiene
Remember that if you find a particular client distasteful, or offensive, no amount of money is worth having to service them.
Suggest he showers, or you bath him and make it part of the session.
Many men who suffer from bad hygeine suffer from depression, alocoholism, and may be subject to mood or personality changes if they feel offended or are sensitive. Approach with caution, respect, sensititity, and understanding.

Aggression
Warn that you will leave if the client gets too rough.
Be tactful – especially if the situation is becoming nasty. Keep your cool and be honest, don’t buy into the client’s bullshit, this should help to diffuse a situation.
If you drive yourself, park your car so only the back can be seen from the house (for example behind a tree or some bushes) and leave the car radio on if possible (this will suggest to the client that someone is waiting for you).
Pens, screech whistles and breath sprays, and pepper spray and pepper spray rings, can make good weapons, and may allow you the opportunity to get away.
Don’t carry knives or guns with you. These can be used against you!
Have your belongings near the door in a pile so you can grab them if you need to get away quickly.
If you have to defend yourself, do it with the intention of hurting him badly. If a client becomes aggressive or violent let him know you can trace him through his credit card, address, car registration number, etc. Explain to the client that you will not hesitate to report him to the police.
Don't trust offenders - Often aggressors will tell you that if you are quiet and do what they tell you to do then they won’t hurt you. If you believe this then you really are putting your life in their hands. If the chance arises then get out of there. If after the attack the assailant attempts to take you to another location then statistics show you may not be coming back at all.

After A Bad Experience
If in danger, don’t hesitate to smash one of the client’s windows or his stereo with a lamp, ashtray, or anything heavy. This will startle (perhaps even scare the client) and it will let your driver, or the neighbors that there is trouble going on and someone is in danger.

Fantasy Fetish, Role Play, Dominance, and BDSM Providers
Set your rules and make sure client knows you are in control.
Check for client references.
Screen carefully.
If you are doing a domination service, before you start make sure client knows what they may be in for.
Have them sign legal waivers to protect you, so if things go wrong, you have some legal protection.
Have clients understand safe words, and that it is okay to use them.
Make sure clients are not drunk or drugged during appointments. Anything that depresses their senses is not safe for them.

Extra Tips For Escort Agency Workers
Let your agency know what service you will or won’t perform.
Find out how your agency operates with bounced checks, and credit card fraud charge backs before committing to an appointment prepaid with such.
Always ring the agency when you leave or extend a booking. You should have a code between yourself and the receptionist to use if you are in trouble.

Tips When Using Drivers
If you are going to service a client, consider employing a driver. Drivers can be very useful in helping you out of difficult situations. They can be used for safety, convenience, excuses for leaving, and traveling for companionship and safety during long distances between towns.
Ask the driver to accompany you to the client’s door. This is a good way to get the client to pay up front.
Then give your money to the driver for safekeeping.
If your booking is in a hotel or motel let the driver know the room number where the service will be taking place.
Make sure your driver waits while you are providing the service.
Use a driver that you know and trust.
Arrange for the driver to knock on the client’s door at the end of the booking, if it has gone overtime and you haven’t called to check in with him.

Assertive, Aggressive, and Pushy Customers
You have the right to say NO!
You have the right to set your own body limits.
Communicate your limits in an assertive manner. Be direct and firm about what you do and do not want.
Be aware of stereotypical behaviors that may be a warning sign of abusive attitudes and/or behaviors.
Take a self-defense class so that you know how to fight back and defend yourself.
Plan ahead, give yourself lots of options, and trust your instincts.
If he/she makes sexual innuendos that do not match your feelings, tell him/her that you are uncomfortable with his/her comments.
If he ignores you and continues or tries to make you feel bad, that’s a red flag!
You do have the right to end a session and leave for any reason, at any time.
Be firm. You do not have to be polite to someone who is ignoring your feelings, or disrespecting you.
Do not blow off responsibility for his actions to alcohol, drugs, or emotional problems. Whatever their "reason," you have the right to keep yourself safe.
Prepare yourself mentally. In case of a hot tempered or abusive client who get's aggressive or violent with you, being prepared and having pepper spray in your purse may be a savior.

What is Sexual Assault, and Little KNown Facts
Any sexual act attempted or committed against your will.
Forced sexual contact by dates, spouses, family members, acquaintances, or strangers, and yes even paid clients.
An act motivated by a need for power and control, not a desire for sex.
Anyone can become a victim of sexual assault, regardless of gender, age, race, religion or social class. 1 in 3 women will be sexually assaulted within their life.

Aggrevating Cons, Scams, and Schemes
The Con Artist - I’m a producer. I would like to audition you for a porn video.
Extortionist - I’m a well known and respected hobbyist. I can make or break your reputation with good or bad reviews so you should let me test drive you to help you with some good reviews.
Blackmailer- If you don’t see me or give me FS, I will write bad reviews on you. Or If you don’t see me, I will out you to the cops.
Scammer - Haggle you down in price because they are a features or VIP member or an employee or owner of some local or national review board.
Arrogant Loser – I’m good looking so you should do me for free! I have a big dick so you should pay me to be with you.
Inconsiderate Jerk – He Double or Triple books, to see if you really look like your photos and if you don’t he takes the pick of the best of the ladies that do show up.

When It's Time to Leave
When the client tells you “I left my wallet in my car. I’ll go an ATM afterwards and come back.”
When the client tells you, “I forgot my wallet, I’ll make it up to you next time.”
When the client tells you he has drugs.

Where it pays for YOU to be honest.
If you don’t look like your photos, because you are using old photos, if you put on lot’s of weight, you look considerably older or younger than your photos, if you are using someone else’s photos, or stock photos… face it, you are misrepresenting yourself which is a bait and switch tactic. It is unfair if you do expect the client to go on with a session if you have lied or misrepresented yourself. Better to leave and learn your lesson. Do not get mad at the client if he’s displeased or sends you away. And do not put the client on a Blacklist because you falsely represented yourself in your advertising also by prentending to be well mannered, intelligent, sophisticated, and to know speaking foreign languages fluently.
If you are NOT who the client booked with, because you are going in place of another provider who has double booked, and she or the agency is asking you to go in that girls place because they don’t want to lose the money…. If the client is not happy with you and isn’t willing to go ahead because you aren’t who or what he expected based on what was advertised. Just leave. Don’t make a big deal of it. Don’t post him on Blacklist. He has the right to refuse the session if you are not who he was expecting.

Internet Forum
Do not be naive and believe that presenting a serious problem to a forum like this can be really helpful. You can have a nice chat but seldom real help. Contact specialized institutions, even a lawyer, or the police directly.

nothing is perfect and we all face danger every day we not think about. when you cross the street if you not look first there is a MUCH HIGHER chance you will be hit by a car. Same true for escort.....chat with him first and dont agree with him in every thing.....some men get angry right away.....of cause you dont see this man EVEN if he say sorry after. IT IS SO CLASSIC FOR A BAD MAN TO SAY HE IS SORRY AFTER HE HAS HIS CHARECTER.


I o nce had sex with a man from England who many month later killed and AMerican man after a fight in the bar. I was not there and it was in a different city than me but I never know he have temper like that. WHen he was with me he was very nice. And even if you look both ways it is still possible to be hit by a car on the street. But the odds are much less and that is what we have to do as escort...... do the best we can to make the odds less than we have bad or worse experience.

A few man say I am too complicated to meet.........GOOD move on.........a man interested in my safety as well as his appreciats I take the time to make everything real. Do not give in to men who pressure you by saying he can choose another girl.........he knew that before he chose to contact you. Stick to your rules

--------------------

As a guy, I completely understand were you are coming from.
Some guys are beyond weird and you just can't tell until your on the wrong end of it.

Your not paranoid, you playing it safe, and i 110% agree with your methods :P
x

Damn thank you for that word of advice about the mace and also about the strangling devices that was smart. I am glad I found this site so I can get advice and speak to other providers since I'm new to this and also have no one to ask questions or get advice.

Get a Tazer, a tazer is illegal in some counties and towns so just make sure you follow the law. Also if your in a situation with a undercover cop make sure you say donation and if he keeps asking donation for what just take money or don't and leave if he try's not to let you leave it is a threat and you can taz him EVEN if he is a cop, unless he already said he was. And if they try to get you for assaulting the cop you can turn the tables and say it was rape since he wouldn't let you leave. Just some advice.

thank you so much for taking the time to post such helpful information,how nice of you
you have covered all the bases.This is very good ,especially for new service providers,great job!!

Great tips! I too have had my uncle die by the hands of a serial killer. (Much smaller scale but..) Because of this I too have been very cautious when seeing new clients. Always verify!!! However, even if you have people verified that does not always mean the person can't "snap" on you. Thanks for the great ideas!

Great advice!

Yes, while everything is relative to circumstances, there is a lot of very good advice here and I hope that this thread keeps getting bumped from time to time so that others may notice it a bit easier!

Better to B SAFE than SORRY!