A client wants me to be exclusive to him

About two years ago one of my clients started booking me on a regular basis. At the beginning of this year he suggested breast implants to me, which are something i had always thought about myself. He told me he would pay for them, and after a bit of thought i agreed to his offer.

I'm currently engaged, although no date for marriage has been set, and i did originally lie to my partner and i told him that i was paying for them. It was only after having them enlarged i told him the truth.

The client has now approached me with an offer to become exclusive to him, so i wouldnt see any other clients anymore and he would be my sole client.

My partner thinks that if i accept the offer i would become the clients mistress / lover, he thinks it would make me more than just his escort.

What do people think?? The client has offered a 3 month inital trial and money up front, and i am very tempted to give it a go.

Thanks, Chan x

Matt, I agree with what you said especially on the "lover, mistress and bareback" issue relative to the author's post.

Chantelle, I must have to understand you at this point and at this time, with what you've done favorable to your client and likewise, his current offer! I do not know him personally so let's just give him the "benefit of the doubt" of his real intentions or plans on you as an/his escort.

Piece of advice, many topics here regarding "escorts and clients serious relationship" and majority doesn't work at all over the period, especially for a married client, regardless if love or anything is the basis! The wife is still the legitimate partner and she has all the rights unto her husband (including his income which he uses for his hobby or escort) client of yours. If you still insist with this relationship, I just hope you would not end to be at the losing end...since very very few (very minimal) had succeeded, but only due to the "will or insistence" of the husband regardless what happens to his family.

There are pluses and minuses to being exclusive, of which most of the major points have already been posted. It may be good to write out such a list based on the knowledge that you have of this client before going much further. It can be safer health wise and financially for you; as well as takes the uncertainty of new meetings and their potential consequences out of the picture. But....

He seems to be passively controlling, which is a powerful kind of control in the long term and should be something to consider. How often do you say 'no' to him, and are his responses direct or lateral in getting you to do what he prefers. For that matter how often do you 'give in' without realizing it or in a manner that seems like the decision comes from you?

Furthermore, the desire to be exclusive is a system of control that can only get stronger with time, and therefore will likely have effects on your personal life as well as you and your fiancée that you cannot foresee now. Additionally, as others have stated, I would be HIGHLY surprised if one of the reasons that he wants to be exclusive did not involve the removal of condoms. Exclusivity with a suggestion to go on the pill along with a battery of health tests on both sides will be designed to satisfy his desire for safety while weakening your position on condoms (particularly if these tests come back as negative several months in a row). Regardless of what he says about this, please consider what may be coming from his point of view and expect it to be so!

Everything that I read here seems to be in relation to strengthening his position with you in one way or another. He would have control on an exclusive level, on a financial level (if there is no other income or you become 'used to' this singular source of income...what if he suddenly pulls it away when you need it, in order to exert control?), as well as a guilt level (the more things he get you beyond a nice set of breasts can be used to make you feel guilty for not acquiescing to some of his other desires). While you should naturally expect some give and take, keeping it balanced is important.

There is a word for what I'm guessing he wants, though it is somewhat used loosely and can certainly have different meanings: personal assistant. Depending on how much he is planning to pay and such, this label, while only being a word, has a few benefits since it implies a certain amount of contractual integrity. In other words, define your role within this moniker when negotiating with him along with a system that allows for renegotiation/amendments. This is not a mistress, but does contain some of the same roles along with additionally duties to make his life/business go more smoothly. It is beneficial in that it gives you some kind of legitimacy to be around him often and hence less a need to 'hide' you from family/friends. This also may mean becoming somewhat close to his business associates as well as his family (which obviously may cause conflicting emotions within you, which could worsen or improve the more that you know him/them).

Either way a PA has benefits and detriments too, however no matter what you choose, you had best define your duties well in advance as well as consider the implications with your fiancée in terms of what he can and cannot accept on many different levels (and never ever lie to him as this kind of relationship requires absolute honesty and trust, as I'm sure that you know). Be aware also that getting the fiancée out of the picture may be beneficial from the clients point of view for a variety of reasons.

There is certainly a lot to consider. I wish you luck and hope that everything goes smoothly to everybody's mutual benefit! =)

Chantelle, I agree w/all the points that've been raised altho I suggest U be VERY careful if U go into this 'relationship' as some men can't handle rejection & treat women as their personal punching bag. My father was like that!

having a client with an exclusive arrangement seldom works. Personal feelings become intense then come 'jealousies' Also the escort ends up not making the money she/he would normally make. You have to be prepared to quit the escort business because of an attempt to have a meaningful/personal relationship- cuz eventually that is what he will expect or things will erode...I know of a few who have been in this exact situation...great topic btw

I agree with most of what has be stated here. I used to know a woman who was the mistress of a doc and when she first started the relationship; she was a beautiful woman. The doc, apparently, thought she was too heavy, she wasn't but, she became a bag of bones and looked terrible.

If you become exclusive be prepared for what could be the worst time of your life, it's not all it's made out to be.

Chantelle, I agree with all the sharings here relative to your post. To illustrate further using our language as engineers, mathematically...1 (which is you) + 1 (the breast implant) is not equal to 2 but 3 or more. There is a hidden figure after those ONEs. You said it is just an exclusive arrangement not a serious relationship. Okay, but watch out for the next move/s like; exclusivity?...and others to come!

Watch out Erotic Synergy (EroSyn) when he will post again his picture relative to the "exclusivity or control" issue here for escorts.

I suggest you try to show HIM all the comments here in your computer/Laptop when you're together and you will see his reaction and next move. Maybe only then you will realize! But there is still a chance for positive things here, depending on the type of the subject client which we do not personally know but just using our perceptions and conclusions based on actual things we saw that happened, as our basis!

with our profession we will encounter this situation many times ,that the client will say they want to be exclusive for them .i would like to emphasize that we are like a fresh meat but sooner or later they will meet much fresher and much talented than you..be wise every decision could affect your future..this is just only my opinion take care!!!

Cant really say if this is good or bad.. maybe if we got a better look at implants it would help (:

I find this thread very intriguing and ironic. A couple of months ago I had a client approach me with an offer to be exclusive (didn't get the breast implants thrown in though..lol). He was a very polite middle-aged single guy that traveled through the week. I had been seeing him on a regular basis (two appointments every weekend) for quite awhile. We discussed an arrangement that made me exclusive to him and agreed on compensation and schedule. Everything was fine for a few weeks until he started asking several questions regarding my marriage and if I was truly happy. I enjoy conversations with clients but make it a point to keep my personal life completely separate and politely conveyed this to him. He seemed to have no problem with my privacy. Shortly after he began requesting more time with me. He would call at the most inopportune times (my wedding anniversary and birthdays..etc) when he knew that I had already made plans and insist that I make time for him. His affection and emotional attraction was apparent and I knew that it had to be addressed. Our conversation did not go well. He wanted to have the latitude to call me and have me drop whatever I was doing to make an appointment with him. He was also concerned that I was more interested in having sex with my husband than him. That was the sign I needed to break our arrangement. I apologized and explained that it wasn't working out. He seemed frustrated at first and wanted to continue seeing me on an individual appointment basis but I politely declined.

So from my experience, and I'm sure that many people on here have their own opinions and experiences different from mine, but I would never do that again. Emotions are funny things and it's easy for either party to view the situation on an unclear level. The money was great and I loved the safety factor of seeing one client, but it wasn't worth risking my existing relationship with my husband or the security I already had established. Just my $.02.